My life is confusing แค่บ่น…….

After put myself out of dissertation time – I had walked around – on my mind
 
No side – No shape – just the empty space – No colour – No light – No day – No night
 
– Just the space on a hole in time –
 
I see everything, but, everything I see is nothing.
 
No pass, I saw – No future, I will see
 
———————————————————————————————————————
 
To enter my mind’s empty space, I walked through the gate of soul, actually I can even call that gate a trapped hole.
 
I was caught by invisible power – only gate I’d been saw, was the entering gate – I tried climb over to pass the hole, but couldn’t.
 
That space was an empty space, it was nothing as I’d said before.
 
———————————————————————————————————————-
Since it could not pass through the entering gate, I walked around to find a new way.
 
Seriously that space was very huge, a lot bigger than I’d been imagine.
 
I could not find anything, when I was looking at the left, I did not see the ending point.
Eventually, when I was looking at the right, the front, or even turned to the back, it was no ending point.
 
———————————————————————————————————————–
It was almost 10 days that I stuck on that space
 
I tried in every possibility ways to backed through the hole.
 
I couldn’t and I couldn’t and I couldn’t, time to time to time and so on.
 
———————————————————————————————————————–
It was the last day there, I sat down the ground, thought what I’d done to be here.
 
I figured out that I did nothing to be the reason to be here.
 
Nothing I did was important to be recognized.
 
The findings would going failed if I couldn’t sparked.
 
Since it’d been sparked, I realized that I lost the mission to go, so that’s why I was stopped here.
 
————————————————————————————————————————
My ex-mission was that I want to have the further study, the second master or the doctorate degree.
 
Since I was working hard on the dissertation, but the grade or score was not good enough to satisfied my efforts putting, I decided to reject my first mission.
 
So I’m lost. Then, I looked around, I didn’t see anyone on my side.
Any one that respected me as mine, not me as someone who they want me to be.
 
I’m alone – a single guy, oh my.
Friends marry, couples mary, but me lonely.
So I’m sad.
 
————————————————————————————————————————–
A perfect matched girl, where have you been, and where are you.
 
I waiting for you for a long time, I’d seen many girls in my life, they walked in and walked out.
 
I was thinking, one was right, but not.
I was thinking the second time, another one was right, but not.
I was thinking the third time lucky would came, other one was right, but not agian.
 
on and on, could I claimed myself as a player, if no one is right.
 
I used to stop, but the came was not the right one, I separated, and tried on new one. 
 
It is very difficult on live with the confusion.
 
and I try hard already.

About hyperglycimia

PONG... me as the pong
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2 Responses to My life is confusing แค่บ่น…….

  1. NUN says:

    หวัดดีจ้ะพี่ปอง นุ่นกลับมาแล้วว
     
    T_T เง้อ ไม่แค่บ่นมั้งค่ะเนี้ย พี่ปองใจเย็นๆน้า
     
    นกยังมีฟ้า กะลายังมีคู่ ถ้าไม่ตายเราต้องเจอคนที่ใช่แหละน่า
     
    อย่าคิดมากอย่าเครียดมากนะค่ะ เด๋วหน้าแก่นะเออ
     
    ยิ้มๆๆๆไว้ค่ะสู้ๆๆๆ เป็นกำลังใจให้พี่ปองเจอคนที่ใช่เร็วๆนะค่ะ ^^
     

  2. NUN says:

    อย่าลืมพักผ่อนให้เพียงพอ
     
    แล้วก้อรักษาสุขภาพด้วยนะค่ะ
     
    มีความสุขมากๆค่ะ
     
    ปล.เปิดเทอมแล้วอ่ะ โคตรขี้เกียจเลยพี่ปอง T_T
     

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